Friday, December 28, 2018

Something New is Coming in 2019

Without revealing too much, a new type of blog featuring me and one other person is on its way. I won't reveal its nature just yet but once it's up and running, nobody who knows either one of us should be surprised. It's something we've been talking about for years and we finally decided to make a go of it.

I have done a similar blog before but this one has a different approach.

Check back in a few days for more info and, most likely, a link!

<---- These people are waiting with bated breath!

Monday, December 17, 2018

An Anthology I Overlooked.

I'm sure I mentioned this anthology at the time but, until earlier today, I'd not only forgotten about it but had also somehow neglected to add it to my Amazon author page.I have submitted the info to them so that error should be rectified soon. In the meantime, if you're interested, feel free to click here to learn more.


 It was published in 2013 and features two of my short stories that were originally published in separate collections put out by the Great Lakes Association of Horror Writers. The stories are "Rosa, Rosa Come out of your Room" and "Across the Pond." The latter was reprinted in the charity anthology "The Ripple Effect".

Saturday, December 15, 2018

Nine Things Social Networking Taught me that I Never Knew Before

Despite all the bemoaning of social networking and its various evils, one cannot deny its ability to inform and educate. I believe this happens in spite of itself but it still happens anyway. I freely admit the ten things below are things of which I was blissfully and perhaps tragically ignorant until I started "meeting" all the people on Facebook and Blogger (I despise Twitter and Snapchat).

If anyone is offended by this list, I am sorry you're so full of yourselves. If anyone isn't offended. I haven't done my job. The list, as always, follows:

  • There are actually intelligent, in many cases highly educated, individuals who were headbangers, i.e. metal-heads.
  • Some people literally only exist to advocate for one cause and have no apparent interests outside of it.
  • Genre fandom is filled with some of the absolute lowest forms of hateful, arrogant, judgmental sub-human life.
  • People who indulge in "Cosplay" are really, really, super serious about it! Like...really serious. Yeah...
  • The world of videogamers is rife with sexist assholes.
  • There either truly are people who believe thoughts and prayers can mitigate horrible tragedies or else people are so incredibly self-absorbed that they feel a simple sentence is all they need to contribute to the human condition.
  • The more individualistic a person claims to be, the more they're looking for someone to tell them what to think.
  • Millions of how people have no idea how to properly vet and disseminate information but they seem more than willing to allow someone else to do it for them as long as it makes them feel righteous.
  • Many people see correct grammar and punctuation as an inconvenient formality rather than a necessity.

    You may notice I chose not to qualify any of my points. I feel they stand alone well enough and, frankly, I don't feel the need to explain myself.  However, I am interested in what others think so share away~

Monday, December 10, 2018

Ten Common Misconceptions About Libraries







Having now worked in three libraries (four if you count the other branch of one of them) I feel qualified to present a list like this. The misconceptions manifest themselves not only from the patrons who come in and out but also the new hires who have an entirely incorrect view of what working for a library will be like. The list is in no particular order of importance and is certainly not at all comprehensive.

]Trust me, for every item I include, I have left out an average of two more.

The list follows:


  • Libraries are quiet places where Librarians will "shush" you if you get too loud- Not anymore. Libraries transformed about twenty years ago into often bustling but rarely totally quiet gathering places with quiet areas. Also, Librarians shushing has become a rarity because so many people nowadays don't think they should be told what to do and are ready to fight about it.
  • Nobody really goes to libraries anymore- Are you enjoying your trip to the Nineties? When you get back, take a trip to an average library located in a city or town with a significant population and tell me how many people you see. Assuming you can make it around all the people standing in the lobby yelling into their cell phones and setting off the alarm with items that weren't checked out properly. Each library I work for averages hundreds of people per day.
  • You basically get to sit around and read until someone comes up and asks you a question- Here's a challenge: Apply for a job at a library that isn't staffed with five people in a tiny town and tell me how that works out for you. There may be times when you are actually uninterrupted. Cherish those times. They aren't going to happen often. 
  • All you do all day is hand people books and update their library cards, right? If you're lucky! (You're never lucky, by the way) The intricate workings of libraries are known only to a select few. When an outsider learns of them, we must kill them lest people find out what we really do to keep these places operational. Happy borrowing! MUUUU HAAA HAAA HAAA!
  • Everybody who works at a library is a Librarian- This one is true because everyone who works at a hospital is also a doctor. Actually, Librarians tend to constitute anywhere from half to a quarter of the staff. Depending on the library, some of those people serving in Librarian capacities aren't Librarians at all. But the kindly, beleaguered folks at the Circulation Desk (like me) most definitely are not. Imagine a law firm where everyone was a lawyer! What would get done? Bickering and a whole lot of, "I didn't go to school to" speeches. Wait. Maybe everybody is a Librarian!
  • Libraries get all their loaning materials through donations so we shouldn't have to pay for them if we don't return them because they were free in the first place- This is a misconception even I had at one time. Not the latter but definitely the former. And while it is true that a tiny portion of a library's collection comes from donations, the majority of it comes from the same method you would use: Cash money, y'all! Each department is allocated a budget to order materials throughout the year, so when you vote against that millage renewal or increase, don't moan when the new Fast and Furious movie isn't available.
  • I can walk into any library and get a library card- This is a regional issue. On the West Coast the libraries tend to all be connected, meaning one card works in the entire state. Where I live, however, that is not the case at all. You have to obtain your library card in the city you pay your property taxes attend school or work. 
  • If I use a self-checkout machine, I will put someone out of work- Absolutely not! Please use a self-checkout machine! Not only does it cut down on the lines (which are often long in direct contradiction to the second misconception) but it frees those of us in Circulation to get other tasks done, including those that take longer than a few seconds per patron.
  • I can watch porn on a library computer and they're ain't nuttin' they can do to me, see!- Nope. Okay, kinda. Here's how it works. You can't technically be kicked out of the library for watching pornography, but if
    someone complains, including an employee, you're out the door. Usually this comes with a limited-time suspension with an option to be kicked out for longer and even for good if you do it again. For Christ's sake, get a Smartphone!
  • Libraries are sustained by my taxes- Sure, why not? That hundred bucks a year from each household can easily sustain the salaries, technological requirements and materials ordering of your typical library. There's even change left over to buy everybody a new car. Seriously? Do I even need to point out how wrong that is? Libraries are sustained by a combination of federal funds (the current president is trying very hard to eliminate this) donations, grants, millage tax and a host of other sources and methods. Your small contribution is appreciated and necessary but it isn't enough to keep libraries open.

Again, this list if mostly off the top of my head. It's also from a Circulation Department person's perspective, which I feel has been woefully underrepresented. 

Friday, November 30, 2018

Not Really Lovin' the Demographics Here.

Sorry, Russia. I'm sure the actual people are fine, but one never knows who is actually visiting the websites these days. Still, in the hope that these are just normal, upstanding Russian citizens, welcome to my blog!


Thursday, November 29, 2018

Bill Maher's Predictible Reaction.

Last week, I posted my thoughts on Bill Maher's response to the way people were reacting to the death of the beloved face of Marvel Comics and movies, Stan Lee. In that piece I discussed how any hostile response to what he wrote would only fuel Maher's resolve that he was indeed correct about comics being useless, disposable kiddie fare. Well, never one to disappoint when it comes to showing his ass in the most misguided manner possible, Maher did what Maher does and dug in.

In an interview with Larry King, who I thought was long gone from the airwaves, he said,
"...I don’t read comic books. I didn’t even read them when I was a child. What I was saying is: A culture that thinks that comic books and comic book movies are profound meditations on the human condition is a dumb fucking culture. And for people to, like, get mad at that just proves my point.”

As I mentioned in my previous post, Maher believes intellectualism has a narrow definition. And apparently inconsistencies are irrelevant.

For instance, Maher clearly wrote in his post that pissed off the world, “Now, I have nothing against comic books — I read them now and then when I was a kid and I was all out of Hardy Boys,” he explained. “But the assumption everyone had back then, both the adults and the kids, was that comics were for kids, and when you grew up you moved on to big-boy books without the pictures.” 

The second half of his point is well-taken; until the Eighties, comics were mostly for kids and teens. However, the first part of his point jumps out because he contradicts it in his comments to Larry King when he says he didn't read comics as a child. Clearly Maher is more interested in making a point than in being accurate, so let's move on to that point.

As I wrote before, somewhere buried in his dismissive claptrap is a salient point. You can read or reread that post for more details on what I mean. Still, Maher is hopelessly stuck in the past when it comes to comics. He has no idea what has been done with them in the modern era and, in typical Maher fashion, he doesn't really give a rat's ass. He is right because he is right because he is Bill Maher.

Instead of being a true intellectual and saying to himself, "Wow. Even setting aside the less well-thought out, angry reactions, an awful lot of intelligent people made some rather impassioned and reasoned points. Maybe I should look into this further." Sadly, that would entail the ability to admit one is wrong and to learn new things that challenge the old things we thought we knew.

I suppose that's where the real disappointment lies. Maher was once an entertaining, albeit arrogant comedian and TV host who encouraged open discussion of issues. His snarky jokes were often biting and incisive. Somewhere along the way, he became too full of himself and decided to be the self-appointed guardian of intellectualism, a job for which he is not at all qualified. This could have been his moment. Bill Maher could have actually stepped out of his own ass for once and admitted he was narrow-minded. Even if he'd still mostly stood by what he said, Maher still could have made room for other ways of thinking. By not doing so, he reveals himself to be no better than the conservatives he criticizes on a weekly basis.

Or, y'know, maybe I just proved his point, too.

Tuesday, November 27, 2018

"Fairy Hunters" is Still Available to Read for Free!

At the start of what I now consider my dry-spell, I wrote a short story based on the image of a sign that said "Fairy Crossing." I wasn't sure if the publisher would use what I came up with but I liked it enough to confidently send it to them. They, in turn, liked it enough to pay me for it and artist John Skewes sent me a copy of the cover image via traditional mail (Below).


Published on the Trigger Warning website in 2016, the story can still be read for free if you click here.

Feel free to write your thoughts in the comments section even, actually especially, if you hated it!

Sunday, November 25, 2018

For Those Who Think So-Called "Social Justice Warrior" Fiction is Something New.


May I present an entry from Stan Lee's column written in the late 1960s? Can you see you're on the wrong side of history yet? If not, here's a not-so-subtle hint: Stan is responding to people like you.






Monday, November 19, 2018

On Bill Maher and his Comments about Comics.


As with all things Internet, even the death of beloved Marvel Comics legend Stan Lee has resulted in at least two inappropriate and presumably well-meaning responses from celebrities. First came actor Armie Hammer's diss of any and every celebrity posting a photo of themselves with Lee because he felt they were making the story about themselves instead of the man who had died. Hammer has since retracted  his comments and referred to himself as an "asshat" in the process.

It's unlikely talk show host and all-around wise-ass Bill Maher will be issuing a similar statement anytime soon, if at all. Maher's comments were of the broader variety, criticizing the medium Lee represented as childish and the readers of the books as harboring delusions of reading great literature instead of escapist pop culture silliness. He makes his point by employing the old adage about putting away childish things once one becomes an adult. It's a dated outlook, a fact he hammers home when he writes, "...the assumption everyone had [when I was young], both the adults and the kids, was that comics were for kids, and when you grew up you moved on to big-boy books without the pictures.”

The error Maher makes in his assessment is the same one superficial thinkers have been making for over three decades, namely that comic books are, by and large, juvenile fantasies incapable of transcending their medium. The very idea that a comic book or graphic novel could do more than stimulate the adolescent portions of the male brain is laughable in their estimation. In order to become an adult, they insist, one must delve deeply into "serious literature," for which there is an oppressively narrow definition.

A couple years ago, I wrote about a middle school principal in Great Britain whose views on fantastic literature drew the ire of many a keyboard warrior. My take was slightly different. I felt he had a point, one that was well-reasoned on its surface but did not hold up to intense scrutiny. Instead of discussing how readers are often focusing on the wrong aspects of fantasy, he felt the entire genre was an enormous waste with no redeeming value. Plus, his views seemed steeped in Anglo-Christian dogma.

Maher supposedly suffers from no such handicap. He is a self-avowed atheist, having gone as far as making a wonderfully entertaining documentary about the fact. Thus we can conclude that his views are based on a humanist desire to pigeonhole intellectualism. He is of the Old World mentality that all worthy intellectual pursuits must be done the same way, reading the same books in the same formats (although digital might be allowable) and eschewing the same "inferior" forms of expression.

It's all a huge bore, frankly, compounded by Maher's constant need to piss off the squares while at the same time seeking their approval. Shock comedy is as juvenile as any comic book, yet there he sits, proclaiming his importance to those still willing to listen. if we're not careful, we all become dinosaurs eventually and Bill Maher is certainly not immune.

A commenter on Facebook made a valid point about Maher shortly after his comments went viral. To paraphrase: Of course Bill Maher would make the point that he shunned comics once he got older. When he was a child, comics were indeed childish fare. In fact, Maher grew up in arguably the worst time in the history of comics. The industry had been gutted by moral outrage thanks to the infamous book "Seduction of the Innocent," which had single-handedly caused a ripple effect resulting in publishers cowering. The comics companies intentionally made their work more juvenile in order to avoid the encroaching specter of further censorship. By the time Maher was in single digits, he was aging out of the Marvel Revolution. He was also likely extremely self-important and saw no value in the new pop culture's embracing of comic books.

Again, Maher likes to upset the apple cart. It's what he's done for years and he used to be really good at it. Lately he seems to be either trying too hard (possible) or succumbing to his own sense of bitterness (likelier). Maher's a control freak. Casual viewing of his show makes that obvious. And if there's one thing control freaks don't like, it's losing control. Smug male elitists have always dictated how we're supposed to view intellectualism, but now people aren't as concerned with their views anymore. Sadly, negative reactions to Maher will fuel his self-righteous attitude and convince him he's more right than ever. So, let's try this instead:

To say he has no valid point at all would be as ludicrous as Maher's blanket dismissal. Much like the British principal, the core of his argument is sound. We cannot ignore the inherent juvenalia of the most visible comic genre, namely costumed crime-fighting superheroes. And despite the fact that even those tales have "grown up" over the past three decades, they are still adolescent wish fulfillment given form. What Maher either fails or neglects to take into account are all the more adult-themed, philosophical comics out there such as "Fun Home" and "My Friend Dahmer." To acknowledge these works would be to invite the possibility of being wrong or, at least, narrow-minded in his conclusion. That's not how Bill Maher rolls.

Ultimately, Maher is a master manipulator who can often make events about him. Neil Gaimain put it best:

"Maher’s just trolling, and lots of people are rising to the troll. (Julie Burchill did it better 30 years ago with her “There aren’t any adult comics because adults don’t read comics” line. ) More people cared about Stan Lee’s death than care about Bill Maher alive."


'Nuff said~



Tuesday, November 13, 2018

Thoughts on the Late Stan Lee.

We all knew it was going to happen. Most of us kept telling ourselves it wouldn't anytime soon but Stan "The Man" Lee was old when many of us were young and each year he remained on this Earth was a gift to fanboys and fangirls alike.

Nobody could deny his infectious enthusiasm for the comics medium and all it has accomplished and still can. To say he became the face of comics is a given. Was it really his fault that those who were not in the know failed to grasp the contributions of so many others to his and Marvel Comics' success? How many people notice the producers and bandmembers behind the frontman/woman when they idolize a singer? Who pays attention to the names in the end credits when the movie is over? Does anyone ask for the name of the anesthesiologist after the operation?

Obviously some people do, and if you're reading this, you're probably one of them. But for those who don't, Jack Kirby's contributions have gone largely unnoticed and unacknowledged. The man defined the look of Marvel for decades to come and the argument has been made (by him as well) that he did most of the work while Lee added words here and there. Further, one could make the argument that Lee refined Kirby's work in ways the artist lacked the skill to do, a claim that becomes more credible when looking at Kirby's early 1970s work for DC.

There's also the claims of Steve Ditko, the recently deceased artist behind Spiderman's look and aesthetic. Lee has never denied that the famous artist designed Spidey's look and contributed greatly to the overall concept. We do know Kirby took a shot at the character first but Lee didn't care for what he came up with.

To be honest, I spent years having issues with Stan Lee. They grew in intensity during the 2000s when I realized younger generations had no idea about the controversy surrounding the credit he'd been given and, going strictly by his generally wonderful cameos in the films of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, had assumed he was the sole creator behind it all. To see their faces when they found out he had nothing to do with the creation of Captain America was truly a sight to behold. I wonder how they'd feel knowing Thanos was created after Lee had become little more than a figurehead in his own organization?

It seems as if those of us that fall in the middle, Gen-X'ers mainly, had the biggest gripe with Lee's rampant glory hogging. We were alive when the Old School genuineness such as Kirby and Ditko were still vibrant and vocal enough to make their points clear. We were there when a new generation of artists broke away from Marvel and formed Image Comics, a creator-owned concept that has somehow reinvented itself and remained relevant. And even though Image wasn't formed as a "screw you" to Lee directly, it was his tendency towards not speaking up when undue credit was thrown his way in the supposed name of advancing the brand that created the environment in which those artists found themselves.

Unlike "Star Trek" creator Gene Roddenberry, there didn't seem to be an arrogance or maliciousness to Lee's credit-taking. In fact, he seemed rather non-plussed by Kirby's apparent rage and Ditko's disgust. If he can be accused of anything, it's most likely good-natured obliviousness. Unlike William Shatner whose ego was off the charts, Lee meant well. You could tell by the sentiments expressed in his "Stan's Soapbox" column. And despite how disappointed I was to learn he was no longer writing the column bearing his name in the Seventies, the early, Lee penned pieces are a look inside what made the man who he was.

With the coming of the MCU, Lee rose to a prominence perhaps greater than what he'd experienced in the Sixties and Seventies. He was once again a household name and his ubiquitous mug was showing up all over the place. His cameos became an expected part of the Marvel movie experience. Lee had officially graduated from hip representative of the Mod Comics Scene to Grandmaster and Elder statesman who made all of this possible. He also, in his advancing years, started giving credit to his collaborators. It doesn't take a cynic to see why Disney would be more comfortable letting the credit rest with a single, identifiable person rather than worrying about having to split the royalties with several others.

Stan Lee became that beloved cool grandpa many of us never had, the old dude who never acted old and who got us. The extra added benefit of him actually helping to create the things that shaped our lives made him even cooler. The messages embedded in his work, social justice, anti-bullying, anti-racism, taking women seriously as individuals, and always the little guy, will survive him.

My relationship with Stan Lee was a complicated one but, in the end, it was a loving and respectful one and that, I think, is that.

'Nuff said~

Wednesday, November 7, 2018

Apparently I'm Available for Bookings!

Like all naughty authors, I sometimes Google myself when nobody is looking. Or maybe I hope someone is looking because I'm such a naughty author. Either way, through the sinful act of self-Googleation, I happened upon this website advertising an opportunity to book me for an event of some sort (the imagination wanders aimlessly) and even provides contact info. I checked them out and they seem legitimate.

I was rather reluctant to allow this to go any further, then I got a look at this picture of what I assume is the staff:


It's cool. Book away.

#naughtyauthor

The Biopic Whose Time Hath Cometh!

With news of the runaway success of the new Freddy Mercury biopic, I've decided to move forward with my screenplay about a troubadour everybody really cares about. Finally his story can be told!
JET SCREAMER!!!

Working title "Baby Baby Baby Ah Ah Ah Ah!" but the studio might consider "Eep Op Ork Ah Ah!"

I have great faith in the studio. It's an independent startup venture with a gofundme page and the owner has an awesome setup in his mom's basement. More on this exciting news once we've scoured the community theaters for actors!

Monday, October 29, 2018

A Different Take on the Apu Controversy.

Maybe you've read about this but in case you haven't, here's a brief synopsis and a link if you want to read further:

The character of Apu on the long-running "The Simpsons" has been singled out as a particularly offensive stereotype thanks to a documentary by comedian Hari Kondabolu called "The Problem with Apu." The film's producer Adi Shankar started  contest to get scripts sent to him that would somehow "improve" the character while still maintaining his place in the Simpsons pantheon. The producers of the series have decided to forego all that and simply drop the popular character from the series, likely minus any fanfare or undue focus.

I have my own views on the whole controversy but I'm not an idiot and won't be discussing them in print. Whether I agree with the documentary's assessment or not, it can be used against me some time in the future. Instead, I have chosen to focus on what I believe is the reason for the response the "Simpsons" producers have chosen.

There has been a problem brewing in the creative world since the Internet went from being an underground rarity to a full-blown accepted part of daily human existence. People have become more involved in their various interests and causes, ridiculously so in many cases, and with that involvement has come an undeserved sense of proprietorship. Somehow real-time interaction has led many to believe they somehow own these franchises they claim to love. This is especially true of Generation X with its constant "You killed my childhood" whining and Millenials who feel the entire entertainment industry is one giant roleplaying game. The moment creation became content, the nature of the field was altered possibly forever.

Konabolu and Shankar are both in their thirties. They have come of age in a time when online slacktivism has been used to accomplish ends both positive and questionable. They know full well the power behind an online movement, even one as seemingly benign as an attempt to "rescue" a character from the perception of negative stereotyping. A contest thrown by someone uninvolved in the series to collect an acceptable script sends a simple and powerful message: We are going to politely yet aggressively make the change we want to see in your product. It is, at its core, a brilliant piece of diplomatic maneuvering and the response of the show's producers was the only one that could have circumvented it.

"The Simpsons" has stood as a monumental achievement of pop culture longevity for three decades. Even for those of us who haven't watched regularly for years, it's obvious they have done something right. And if social attitudes towards one of their characters have changed, one assums they're perfectly capable of dealing with it themselves. By allowing an outsider no matter how well-intentioned to push his way in, they would be sacrificing whatever autonomy they've enjoyed. The same autonomy that has allowed them to outlast any other animated series in history (so far.)

From a writer's perspective, it's a smart move. Everybody knows the show will be going off the air soon. They've made their mark and they want to continue to do so with the time they have left without some guy whose desire it is to hitch onto their accomplishments trying to influence "content." So while it may seem like a compromise, this move is actually the opposite. I applaud the decision not for its end result or even for that fact that the issue hasn't been resolved, but because creators have stood up to a softer, shrewd form of censorship and said no.

Saturday, October 27, 2018

10 of the Oddest Story Rejection Reasons I've Ever Received. (Updated with a correction)

This is a post I've been contemplating writing for a few years now and I feel I've finally reached a point where I can do it the right way, namely without employing unwarranted insults or naming names. The younger, less confident me might have indulged in both just out of spite but I've reached the conclusion that people be different than one another and no amount of pointing out how ridiculous you find their points of view will change a thing about most of them.

Whenever an editor takes the time to provide personal feedback, it's a good thing. It's also rare. Most rejections consist of "Sadly it wasn't for us," which is not at all helpful. But when someone is taking in hundreds of submissions per month, it's understandable. And I have received some very helpful feedback in the form of rejection letters. These are not the helpful ones.

However, at the risk of incurring undue wrath or burning bridges, I'm going to keep my reasons general without mentioning the particular stories (several of which wound up published elsewhere) or their precise themes. Keep in mind these are in no particular order and they are mostly paraphrased:


  • "Your story about revenge from beyond the grave is too angry for my anthology about revenge from beyond the grave."
  • "We didn't believe your character could be so desirable to so many employers because she is a customer service rep so the story didn't work for us."
  • "Your story about the Old West has a truck in it because it goes back and forth between past and present so it's not really about the Old West even though 80% of the story takes place there."
  • "There's too much showing and, presumably, not enough telling in your story."
  •  "This story might offend people who like to read because it presents a book store in a negative light."
  • "I misinterpreted your homage as fan fiction which we don't publish."
  • "Your realistic horror story was too dark and disturbing and might make readers uncomfortable."
  • "Readers can't be expected to go back and forth in a short story despite the literal volumes of stories published that make them do exactly that."
  • "All the editors LOVED LOVED LOVED this story, so of course we don't be publishing it."
  • "The voice of the narrator is well done and fits the eerie setting perfectly.  The suspense carried me along, and your writing is exceptional and even though those would be reason enough, I am one of those people who judges every story by whether or not it has an ending that floors me so it's a no from me."

Every single reason listed above is genuine. I did not pull a fiction writer and fabricate any of them. With time, most of them wound up being funny to me and as with any field, some are indicative of a general incompetence on the part of those doing the evaluating. If you're an aspiring writer reading this post and feeling in any way discouraged, perhaps this next part will make you feel better: Each of the reasons listed above pertains to a different story, meaning there were ten stories. Eight of those stories were published elsewhere. It takes persistence and faith in one's self to take these types of things in stride and keep submitting. Then you too will one day have ridiculous stories to tell~

Correction: The editor who sent me "There's too much showing and, presumably, not enough telling in your story" as a reason replied to my email apologizing for what turned out to be a typo. So, thank God at least that one was an error.)

Thursday, October 25, 2018

"Halloween 2018" A Review.

.

John Carpenter's original two "Halloween" movies were my first immersion into genuine non-supernatural horror. I can't remember if I read the novelization of the first movie first or after seeing the film, but the story stuck with me in ways other inferior movies such as "Friday the 13th" and its endless supply of decreasingly coherent sequels did not. "Halloween" had a single mastermind behind its concept and execution, from story to casting to direction to even the music. It is auteur horror at its finest.

The sequel, co-written by Carpenter, continued the story by setting it on the same night and providing new revelations about Michael Meyers and Laurie Stroud that the director has admitted not being overly pleased with. Carpenter is notoriously candid and, I think, hard on himself. The second movie may have lacked the uniqueness of its predecessor but it was a solid follow-up, especially thanks to the expanding of Donald Pleasance's character Loomis.

This latest film has decided to dump the events of the second film and its subsequent non-Carpenter produced sequels, some of which weren't bad. In this direct sequel to the original, Michael Meyers was apparently captured after Dr. Loomis shot him and has spent forty years in a mental institution typically silent and seemingly unresponsive. When a pair of podcasting "journalists" show up to try and interview him, it is only when he sees his iconic William Shatner mask that he shows even the slightest glimmer of a reaction.

Sadly, Donald Pleasance passed away in the mid-Nineties, so the weight once again fall on the shoulders of Jamie Lee Curtis just as it did in "Halloween H20," the first attempt to make a direct follow-up to the original. That film reeked of crass commercialism. Its sequel was such a ridiculous farce that even Carpenter has expressed befuddlement at its existence. So, how does this new one fare?

Better, for sure. For one thing, there's an obvious and genuine love for the source material on the parts of the filmmakers, an infectious enthusiasm that makes even the less successful elements of the film more palatable.

The story is solid. Laurie Stroud never got over the attempt on her life or the deaths of her friends. Since the events of the second movie never took place, she has become a rather tragic, sad character similar in almost every way to Sarah Connor in the second "Terminator" film. Laurie has spent decades learning how to fortify her home and protect herself for what she considers the inevitability of Michael's return. Her relationship with her daughter is strained and her granddaughter just wishes she would move on in life.

Curtis portrays the present-day Laurie Stroud brilliantly, somehow reminding us of the innocent girl in the original while creating a whole new character. Wil Patton is also great as the police officer who stopped Loomis from killing Michael all those years ago. There's even a new doctor who was Loomis' student but his take on Michael Meyers is very different from his mentor's. In fact, he's involved in a plot twist that shouldn't work. But it does. In fact, most of the movie works.

The minor quibbles I have are mostly technical. For instance, the cringe-worthy teen dialogue/characters really show how well Carpenter wrote the scene where Laurie and her friends are walking home from school in the first film. There's also a scene where Laurie and Michael are going to face each other that stretches on to the point where the supposed "scare" is more a relief that the plot is once again in motion. There are also some rather clumsy references to the other films, including Laurie referring to Michael as "The Shape" and the attempt to recapture the creepiness of Michael's original escape from the mental institution. There's also the ditching of plot points from "Halloween II" that really fleshed out the story. But those facts didn't diminish my enjoyment.

The gore is a bit much but that's too be expected. I usually find excessive gore to be cheap and lazy, an easy way to horrify without actually creating true horror. And while the filmmakers do tow the line, they never cross it.

I do think a sequel would be a bad idea but since this movie broke box office records for a female-led horror movie's opening weekend (who the hell keeps these stats???) it's obvious they will ruin a great conclusion with another film.

Still, while this one is the only one, it's a great follow-up.

Tuesday, October 23, 2018

An Anthology That Had Slipped off my RADAR.

I always knew there was at least one story (not including the ones from a certain magazine whose publisher unceremoniously removed all trace of the work of several authors for reasons unknown) that wasn't included on my author page. A conversation with a co-worker at the new library where I have accepted a supervisor position jogged my memory and here it is...or was. Whatever.

Monday, October 22, 2018

OUCH!

The anthology in which my short story, "The Last Big Gamble" appears certainly garnered a mostly negative reaction from this reader! I guess I got off easy since she never mentioned me or my story because yikes!


It happens, of course. Tastes are subjective and since this particular reader identifies herself as a Las Vegas resident, accuracy and authenticity are important to her when writers represent her city. Some of the criticisms she has of the anthology in general are definitely worth paying attention to, particularly where she wrote, "After completing the collection, I couldn't help but wonder why these other authors didn't think of using Vegas history to create a cool story like this author did, instead of creating half-assed barely-about-Vegas stories."

I understand that reaction all too well. Stories set in Detroit and other parts of Michigan often feel like they were written about the East Coast using dialogue no one in my home-state would utter. But sometimes the concept and plot are good enough that that isn't a deciding factor for me. This reviewer clearly doesn't feel that way. For her, authenticity seems to be paramount and that is a perfectly valid reaction. 

However, I did intentionally make vague allusions to how Vegas got its start without providing a blatant history lesson. My story takes place in a post-vacation destination reality where people barely remember what it was like before. Something is alive in the desert and is feeding off their hope. If a story about tragic people desperately trying to break even with the odds stacked against them isn't about Vegas, then perhaps that city has a lot of work to do on its reputation with the rest of the world. 

I am glad the reviewer found two stories she enjoyed, however, whether or not mine was one she even noticed. Can't please everyone. 

Tuesday, October 16, 2018

"It's not the job of the artist to give the audience what the audience wants. If the audience knew what they needed, they wouldn't be the audience.  They would be the artists."
-Alan Moore

Wednesday, October 10, 2018

A Couple Positive Moments.

And there are those moments when you nearly forgot you sent a story in for consideration and you receive the following email:

Christopher,

"The Last Book on the Shelf" has made our second read list, so we're going to hold on to it for a while longer if you don't mind. We'll keep you updated and let you know the final results by November 1.

Thank you for giving us the opportunity to read it.



Also, there's the warm feeling that goes along with a positive working relationship where you feel comfortable sending an email inquiring about an anthology that had already closed for submissions just to see if they might be willing to take a look at a story I think they might like. Basically, I was being Opposite Me, not assuming I knew the answer. This was their reply:

Normally, we wouldn't. But because we've worked together before I'm happen to pass it on so it gets a read. Send it through when you can (but don't take too long as we're close to being finished...


Sometimes it's the small things that make my day, especially when that day was not a good one.

Tuesday, October 9, 2018

The Dreaded Author Interview Questionnaire.

Every so often, a publisher in whose anthology my work is set to appear gets the idea that introducing the world to the likes of me is a positive thing. It certainly makes sense. Readers like to know who the authors are and how their minds work when it comes to their craft. It also increases the author's web presence and (potentially) places the publisher in the position of having brought the author to the world's attention either before or during a rise to some prominence. At least, that's the optimistic view.

Some authors feel pressured to not come off sounding like morons when they answer theirs. I don't worry about that; my concern is sounding pretentious and full of myself. I'm not a filmmaker, so that particular trait wouldn't be very becoming. In order to counter that, I tend to use humor in my responses except where seriousness gets my point across. The interviewers seem to enjoy it.

It's been a while since I've filled one out, but the time has come again thanks to B Cubed Press, which was already kind enough to create a page for me based on one published work with them. The questions are refreshingly unique and mildly intimidating so let's see what I can accomplish this time!

(Obviously I'll post a link when it's available)

Wednesday, October 3, 2018

TEMPORARILY CLOSED FOR LIFE-CHANGING EVENTS.

I haven't updated this blog in two weeks because of some changes that recently took place in my life, most notably in the job world. Having taken on a supervisory position, I am finding myself with less time to post lately. This might be a good thing, considering the issues taking place in the U.S. right now. It's probably best that I refrain from sharing my views.

However, I do have a short story coming out soon and other things to write about. I'm sure there will be time once I'm all settled in. So, thanks for your patience, those of you who actually read this thing.

I'll be Bach.

Wednesday, September 19, 2018

Positive Mention



It's always nice when another author mentions your work. And while the mention doesn't include my name or the title of my story but the concept is and the overall discussion of the anthology is positive. Read it here.

Sunday, September 16, 2018

Let's Hear it for Diversity (And paid publishing opportunities)!

Sometimes, when one has been writing long enough and has been fortunate enough to see publication of several pieces, there is the occasional feeling that a completed work is a slam dunk. Such was the case with my short story, "Your Future for a Low, Low Price" which was just accepted for publication in the Colors in Darkness anthology "Deadly Bargain" (pictured below).





My story deals with the provided character who first appears as a non-specified Eastern European handyman/peddler in a well-to-do suburban neighborhood who draws the ire of an immigrant-hating Amurican looking for someone on whom he can take out his lifelong frustrations. But when the peddler offers him the future, his rage gives way to something even worse. As soon as I fiished it, I knew it was likely to get picked up by someone.

I don't have a publication date yet but once I do, I'll post an update.

Wednesday, September 12, 2018

A Rejection Letter to be Proud of.

Anyone who writes and actually submits their work knows the inevitable rejection letter is part of the process. And for those of us who don't cower under the scrutiny of qualified professionals and run screeching with terror into the whore-ish arms of Amazon's self-publishing world, it can get pretty damn discouraging. As I recently wrote, I went through a dry spell where literally nothing I was sending out was getting published. Scroll to the earlier part of this year to see my posts on that topic. I was ready to stop.

However, I have published two short stories this year, marking something of a "return" for me. That doesn't mean there haven't been rejections, though. Unless a writer is on the level of being able to sell copies via name recognition, rejections tend to outnumber acceptances. But sometimes they're not so bad, and other times they're downright encouraging. Take the one below for example:

"Unfortunately, we are not able to include your story in the anthology. Our intention with the theme had always been to publish stories that had something to do with the sky. We received a large number of submissions, such as yours, that took the theme figuratively rather then literally. For a time, we considered changing our original plan to include some of these, but eventually decided to stay true to the initial theme. That said, your story was enjoyable and, if we have an upcoming collection that I feel it may fit, I'll get in touch."


I'm fine with that. Yes, it's disappointing as this is a story I've been trying to place somewhere for a few years, but the positive response means there is a possible home for it after all. And if the publisher finds a use for it, even better.

Sometimes it's okay to just have one's work acknowledged.


Saturday, September 8, 2018

R.I.P. Burt Reynolds

Burt saw this coming, hence the book "But Enough About Me" but it still hurts to lose one of the iconic actors of my youth. Because of his incredible sense of humor despite all the screwing over he received from Hollywood, the cartoon below is both appropriate and fitting. A fond farewell to the man who chose fun roles over heady ones because that's how he chose to live his life.



Tuesday, September 4, 2018

Latest Review!





As some of you might know, the anthology pictured above featuring my short story, "Ultimate Messiah Smackdown" appears alongside several notable authors. So when I read the latest customer review from a pastor who actually gets what I was aiming for, it meant even more than usual.

Appearing alongside the likes of David Gerrold and Mike Resnick is wonderful enough, but when your story is someone's favorite, that is beyond humbling. Add to that the fact that this particular pastor wants to use my story in one of his sermons and I'm all a'tizzy. Making a difference, one disgusted work of quasi-fiction at a time!

Read the review here.

Thursday, August 23, 2018

Wednesday, August 22, 2018

Diverse Voices in Spec Fic and Why Renaissance Festivals are Evil

One of the many reasons I detest Renaissance Festivals is that they tend to push the laughable narrative that all human progress began in Western Europe around the time people started wondering if monthly bathing might actually be a good idea. There's also the fact that it's primarily attended by nerds (not geeks) and individuals who are perfectly at home attending tractor pulls and monster truck rallies. Now that may sound elitist to you and it is, so let's move on, shall we?

More importantly, at least from my perspective, is the negative and continuing affect they have on fiction, fantasy in particular. When I was a kid, I thought all fantasy was based off Western European society and mythology. It's why I grew to dislike it so much as I became an adult. But even the so-called "Urban Fantasy" which is fantasy occurring in modern-day city settings, not African-American in nature, tended to have its rooted firmly entrenched in the history and culture of Europa.

Boring!

As well-made as it is, if I have to suffer through another episode of some "Game of Thrones" style series, I will probably not emerge the better for it. There are so many other cultures out there with stories to be told and retold. Fortunately, those voices are starting to be heard.

What prompted this post was an ad for the novella pictured below. I haven't read it but the concept sounds intriguing and far more exciting than the by-the-numbers Euro-fantasy we normally see.

Let's face it. You're probably pretty dull if your entire fantasy universe consists of Middle Ages wizards and sword-wielding Crusader cliche's. And let's not forget the science fiction equivalent of the noble young white male hero in the making. There are so many authors writing so many stories that don't depend on such lazy by-the-numbers hackery. Some examples:

Cixin Liu
Nnedi Okorafor
Octavia Butler
Samuel R Delany
S.P. Somtow

Try those on for size and let me know what you thought.



Tuesday, August 21, 2018

Updated Author Bio (Because you know you care...don't you?)

Due to recent uptick in writing activity from lil' ol' moi, I thought it might make sense to update my author bio so it wasn't so hopelessly out of date. 

So, here it is.

Monday, August 20, 2018

Excerpt from a (so far) Rejected Short Story.

The following is a passage from a story I wrote very quickly called, "Arnold's Jurassic Trinity" for an anthology looking for robot dinosaur stories. Unfortunately, for them and for me, they chose not to publish it. Still, I'm rather pleased with it and thought I'd share a portion of it just because:




Here’s the thing: Almost every supposedly delusional thing that came out of Arnold’s mouth that wasn’t about undesirable pregnancy came from a movie. He sat in the library for hours watching video clips. Those clips then inspired him to conjure up whatever he latched onto. It was inevitable that he would eventually hit upon something that actually worked.
    “I tried with the bees first,” he told a member of the Circulation staff. “They were too small, so the souls wouldn’t fit inside.” He laughed. “They kept exploding!”
    Bees exploding from souls. Sadly, that was just a typical Arnold rant to most of them. One person pointed out the obvious difference in his narrative by mentioning how there seemed to be action involved this time. Normally an Arnold rant involved nothing but speculation and assurances of Great Plans being in the works. This time, the person said, he actually claimed to have done something.

Makes me want to read more! ;)


  

Sunday, August 19, 2018

Do Canadians Find me Fascinating?

If the stats on my blog are any indication, the answer to the question posed above is a resounding..."I think so!" Maybe it's the last name, which from all my seconds of research is French Canadian, but on August 17th, literally twice as many Canadians visited this blog as U.S. Americans, as that beauty contestant once said.

I'm honored. No, wait. I'm honoured.  Living in a state that borders Canada, I have always loved your country and let's face it, a huge percentage of our greatest comedians come from Canada! There's also a wonderful speculative fiction movement happening there, second only to the one currently occurring in Australia.

So, welcome my friends. Keep a spot open for me if this Trump thing keeps going the way it most likely will. And permit me to communicate to your in your native tongue:

*Ahem*

How's she goin', eh?

Saturday, August 18, 2018

Reader Review.

A rather intelligent review of the Thuggish Itch: Via Las Vegas anthology that features, among others, my short story, "The Last Big Gamble."

The reader wisely chose to review the themed anthology as a whole while pointing out what he liked about the stories in relation to that overall theme. I love when readers grasp what they're reading and are able to articulate it so effectively.

Read the review here.


Monday, August 13, 2018

New Anthology Release

The second of two anthologies being released this week featuring short stories written by me is available here on August 15th. This one features my libel-free story, "The Last Big Gamble." I honestly consider it one of the best things I've written and would love to know your opinion. Yes, even if you consider it pretentious rubbish.



Saturday, August 11, 2018

A Religious Experience Featuring Yours Truly!



Being billed as the #1 New Release on Amazon, this is the anthology I've been mentioning that features my short story, "Ultimate Messiah Smackdown." Included in its august pages are such luminaries as David Gerrold, Mike Resnick and Adam-Troy Castro! The official release date is August 14th.

Order it here.

Monday, August 6, 2018

Don't Mess with Wayne Newton!

During my recent bout of stories written to suit specific anthologies I decided to try my hand at a dark, dystopian tale with Las Vegas as its central theme. Not only did I come up with an idea the instant I read what they were looking for, it was also for an Australian publication.

You may or or may not know this, but Australian authors and publishers have been churning out consistently interesting, high-quality speculative fiction work for most of the 2000's. Check out the work of Max Barry sometime and tell me what you think. Unless you didn't care for it, in which case you can go straight to hell with a bag of flammable aerosol cans. I kid, of course. You don't actually have to bring flammable materials to hell...just go there.

My story, "The Last Big Gamble," (yeah, I know it's on the nose) was submitted several months ahead of the deadline, so I had been on pins and needles ever since, hoping it was accepted. Much like "The Hero Disease," this was a story that took hold of me at the outset and refused to let go until it was completed. Those stories tend to connect with editors, at least in my experience. Fortunately, this one was not the exception that proved the rule. The editor enjoyed it very much. There was just one problem. The edited email below provides the details:

Hi Christopher,
We have just finished reading the story submissions for Thuggish Itch's Viva Las Vegas collection. I enjoyed your story and its dystopian aspects, however, the links to Wayne Newton worried me in terms of libel. That is, that having a character so closely based on a living figure could cause us some problems, particularly with him throwing people in the pit at the end, ha ha.
If you've some spare time and are willing to rework it a little by Wednesday 1 August I'm willing to give it another read before making a final decision on whether or not to include it.
Regards
VK


I don't mind telling you that I, like most of the rest of humanity, am haunted in my dreams by the evil that is Wayne Newton. Oh, he can pretend to be a smiling, joking fun guy with a voice of smooth velvet and a wardrobe gifted by the gods of antiquity. Wait. What was my point?  I forgot. So, here is my reply:

Ha! I feared that might be an issue. I would be happy to rework it. What are your suggestions? 

Seemed reasonable enough. I'm not precious about story elements that don't detract from the overall quality of the piece. There are ways around these sorts of things. Lord knows I've paraphrased enough song lyrics to avoid having to pay royalties when it would have wiped me out financially. One week later I received the following email for all my *ahem* hard work:

Hi Christopher,
Thanks for making those edits last week. I am pleased to let you know that we have now finished reading submissions for Thuggish Itch, Issue 1: Viva Las Vegas and that we have selected your story, The Last Big Gamble, for inclusion in the anthology.


So, if there's a lesson to be learned here, it's to be open to change and feedback. Fight the battles that matter, not the ones that lift your ego. And most importantly, don't mess with Wayne Newton 'cause he ain't playin'!

(As always, more info once the anthology becomes available)

Wednesday, August 1, 2018

Upcoming Anthology Announcment

I recently submitted a story to B Cubed Press that was accepted despite my initially having been told they had no more room in the book! But the publisher liked the story and suddenly there I was being ncluded with such notable top tier authors as Adam Troy-Castro, David Gerrold, Mike Resnick and David Brin! I'ts an honor to be included with these four as well as the other authors.

I'll post a link when the anthology is available.

Next up:

How Wayne Newton could have affected my chances at getting a story published!

Monday, July 23, 2018

A Good Place to Find My Work.

If you're boycotting Amazon and don't want to go to my author page, the Internet Speculative Fiction Database is a good albeit not comprehensive place to find and index of quite a bit of my work. I ran across this when Googling a short story title of mine to see whether or not it had been previously published. That's right. I'm such a yuge author that I sometimes forget which stories of mine have been accepted by publishers.

Or maybe I'm just a crappy records keeper. Meh. Six of one, half dozen of the other!

Click here for the link.


And don't forget to order this little trip through funtown!


2 Migraine-inducingly Moronic Posts

 No commentary, no attempts to rationalize. Just gaze, if you dare, on the stupid!