Thursday, January 20, 2011

And my writing has been called disturbing???

Just as he was rising to prominence as one of the greatest spin doctors in media history by claiming he was dwelling in some "No-Spin Zone" of his own imagining, former tabloid scumbag turned neo-con carnival barker Bill O'Reilly released a self-serving novel in 1998.

Entitled "Those Who Trespass," the novel concerned a virtuous O'Reilly-like TV host who was programmed by the IRA to kill everyone who ever sabotaged his career while having sex with minors and lamenting his nights "snuggling" with his dad as a child. The novel contained some of the most disturbing prose in recent memory and aided in the slow yet sure decline of Random House's reputation for quality.

Below are some of the lines from the novel that stand out the most (Keep in mind much of the sex is taking place with a minor):

"Say baby, put down that pipe and get my pipe up."

"Cup your hands under your breasts and hold them for ten seconds."

"Off with those pants."

As an Amazon commentor put it, "Nothing, and I really mean nothing, gets me as hot and bothered as reading about a 15 year old doing that fellatio business after hitting a crack pipe." This is the guy who decries violence in media and then firmly embraces it in what another reviewer referred to as a "cockroach-infested tome."

It appears as though O'Reilly missed is rue calling: Horror-porn~

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