The Amazine Spider-man. A Review.

Let's get this out of the way: I was a huge fan of the original Spidey trilogy and truly felt Tobey Macguire captured the essense of the early Peter Parker. I felt a reboot was unecessary and a slap in the face, motivated more by Paramount's need to get another film released before they lost the licensing. I never planned to see the film, but my wife and a free ticket could not be denied.

I went into the theater fully expecting to hate the movie as much as I'd hated "The Dark Knight" four years previous. It had all the earmarks of the kind of film I hate: A too-soon reboot, a pretty boy teen dream as its star, and an attempt to darken the franchise because nobody seems to think any other kind of superhero film is valid anymore.

Thus we return once more to Spidey's origins, this time with a sub-plot involving his parents and their mysterious disappearance. That's one of a few storylines that fails to pay off in this movie, but let's not get ahead of ourselves.

This Peter Parker grew up in the post-Grunge ear, so he's emo as all hell and, despite his looks and rock star build, is a social outcast. Also, unlike the Peter of early comics lore, he's not a "milksop." When he sees school bully Flash Thompson kicking the snot out of some kid, he leaps to his defense and refuses to photogaph it. One would think he'd want to get some evidence, but that would make sense and prevent Parker from also getting his ass handed to him.

This Spidey film follows the love story more closely to the comics. Gwen Stacey, she of the yellow bangs and short skirts, was Pete's first love, not Mary Jane. Not to spoil the future, but she's also the second person he's unable to save from a horrific death, but that doesn't happen in this movie. Gwen is also a genius science student who works for Curt Connors, the scientist all true Spidey fans know is the bad guy in the movie as soon as they hear his name or see he only has one arm.

The stage for intrigue is set when Pete finds his dad's old attache case and runs across some files with long equations. When he sneaks into the Oscorp building to meet with Connors, all the sets fall into place and we got us a Spiderman movie.

Mostly.

Part of the problem lies in inferior casting choices. Sally Field is a great actress, one of our finest, but she's more miscast here than ever as Aunt May. She and Martin sheen, whose Uncle Ben is excellent, also have zero on-screen chemistry. Then there's the husky-voiced Emma Stone as Gwen Stacey. She's not at all a bad actress but she often seems to be in a different movie until the final act.  The choice of Welsh actor Rhys Ifans as Connors is an odd once that has mixed results. As he changes from the good-natured humanist into the insane creature, his scenery chewing is sometimes painful to sit through.

That brings us to Andrew Garfield. How is he? Not bad, actually. His Peter Parker isn't the one from the previous films anymore than Christian Bale's growling Batman is the same as Michael Keaton's more refined version. As Parker, Garfield is effective, although it's obvious at times he's acting. As Spidey, he's a mixed bag of nuts.

Sam Raimi and MaGuire wisely chose not to have Sidey wisecrack too much while this film tries to show-horn in the one-liners. Garfield is not up to the challenge. His delivery is forced and the lines aren't very good. And perhaps that's the fault of the screenwriters. The dialogue in this installment is nowhere near the level of, for instance, Michael Chabon's in Spiderman 2.

That brings us to the visuals and effects. Frankly, they're lacking. The Spiderman suit...OY! I just became Yiddish to express how ugly it is. Then there are the webs. Whoever designed the effects for those should be backlisted. It's absolutely terrible. Not only do they look fake, but half the time they don't even seem to be coming from Spidey's web-shooters! They just appear on the screen.  And the Lizard looks as fake as the Scorpion King from ten years ago.

Director Mark Webb has nowhere near the action sensibilities of prevoius director Sam Raimi. The fight scenes are paint-by-numbers and uninspired and the webswining scenes, so effective in the other films, seems functional and serviceable in this one.

Bottom line, I didn't care as much what happened to anyone in this film as I did the originals. Dramatic misfires such as the way Uncle Ben dies like a bad-ass vigilante or the lack of closure on Pete's parents and the man who killed his uncle just make the movie feel incomplete. The epilogue during the credits backs that up.

All in all, it was a decent effort that would have been much better with the original creative team involved. I'd see a sequel, but much like Batman Begins, I might hate the second one to the point where the entire franchise is ruined permanently.

At least it was free~

Why a Writer’s Conference?

In this age of self-starters connected via social media to the entire industrialized world with the ability to self-publish through sites like Amazon and LuLu, many wonder why the older way of doing things, namely conferences, are even necessary. We’ll answer that question with another question:

Have you seen what the majority of writers who think they can go it alone produce?

At the risk of offending the self-publishing movement, (a.k.a. the “Indie writer” movement) there are no mythical “Gate-keepers” attempting to prevent new talent from thriving. On the contrary, the publishing industry thrives on new talent.

Are there close-minded publishers and editors out there? Absolutely. They’re human beings, not evil, inter-dimensional snobs bent on preventing the free flow of ideas. There’s often a legitimate reason your story or novel was rejected. The concept of letting work that isn’t up to snuff through the supposed “gates” so “the people can discover it” is just an endorsement of laziness.

This is not to say all self-published writers turn out an inferior product. Some well-known traditionally published writers have turned to self-publishing their more controversial work, such as award-winning science fiction author Norman Spinrad. However, without professional involvement and input, the likelihood of not reaching one’s potential is vastly increased.

If you chose to become a surgeon, you wouldn’t (we hope!) buy a bunch of books on the type of surgery you found most interesting, absorb them and start cutting into someone. Why should writing be any different?

The answer, of course, is it shouldn’t. Writer’s conferences are there to help you, to guide you, and to ultimately provide for you a venue in which you can thrive while learning. Sitting in your home office uploading files can never substitute for that experience!

Quick Thought on Audio Books.

Some people consider themselves having actually read a book if they listened to its unabridged audio adaptation. I don't, but I can see their point as a valid one even I don't think it qualifies as actually reading.

Much like what Roger Ebert said when digital film was first on the rise, I'm not sure the brain processes the information the same way. In fact, I don't believe it does. Still, that doesn't mean I don't enjoy the occasional audio book. I just tend to listen to the ones I've already read.

That brings me to quality. Too often the chosen reader is quite terrible. I remember back when my mom was still alive and experiencing difficulty holding books due to her advanced Diabetic Neuropathy. I bought her scores of audio Star Trek adventures, most of them abridged and read by some cast member or another. They were excellently done, but they were the exception.

Disqualifying dramatized audio books that have full casts in them, which my friend and colleague P.S. Ramsey absolutely despises and I happen to adore, a straight read-through of a novel is a precarious thing, especially when the reader is selected to read a famous, well-loved work. I submit the ridiculously awful selection of Ethan Hawke to read Vonnegut's Slaughter-House Five.

Don't get me wrong; I respect the hell out of Ethan Hawke. I like his politics, his acting and, while I've never had occasion to read it, I hear his writing is also quite good. But his reading of Vonnegut's seminal masterpiece is painfully dreadful.

Maybe it's me, but Vonnegut's work tends to havea certain up, clipped tonality to it, does it not? His sparse prose and blunt phrasing lend themselves to an almost gleeful celebration of the mundane and inhumane. Yet Hawke reads it as if he's auditoning for the narration of "Apocalypse Now." He sounds tired, withdrawn, sleepy, even hungover.

Naturally, if I'd never read the novel I'd have no idea what cadence to expect, and for those weirdoes who still haven't read Slaughter-House Five, I suppose that makes his reading just fine and dandy.

For a fan of the book, however, the entire appeal of the narrative is wrecked beyond all recognition. There are few really good readers of audio books in the business. Most of Stephen King's books are exceptionally well-read, including those read the by the author himself.

"Exceptionally" is the operative word, however.

I've been told I'll be reading my own "Dreamers at Infinity's Core" someday in the near future for downloadable audio. I will, of course, read it the way it's supposed to sound and nail ever nuance and stand-out moment.

Be kind~

Good Writing Vs. Good Ideas.

I've always felt true writers are more into quality writing than ideas. That isn't to say ideas aren't equally important, but which one can stand on its own? Turn a wonderful phrase, paint a picture or a series of pictures with words and people will be spellbound. Describe a great idea and people will usually say, "Now what?"

If there's a finer wordsmith in the field than Michael Chabon, I haven't encountered them. His sentences flow with a beauty and an immediacy that is at once delicate and rooted in concrete reality. That's why I read "Manhood for Amateurs," his non-fiction collection of essays, so quickly.

Still in the mood for quality writing in lieu of genre, I jumped over to Tamas Dobozy's "Last Notes and Other Stories," a short story collection from yet another author whose elecric prose leaps off the page.

These are the types of  authors whose work informs mine. Their talent, their observations and, yes, their unwavering honesty are what I shoot for when I write. If my story contains a five-headed monster, it shouldn't feel like something I'm drawing attention to.

Sadly, too many genre authors do just that these days in an apparent fruitless attempt to recapture the Joss Whedon pop culture reference lightning in a bottle.

I'm not finished reading Dobozy's book, but I can already recommend the first two stories. The one about the married couple that pummel each other in the boxing ring as a form of therapy is definitely worth reading! A perfect example of an idea not overshadowing the writing.

I can definitely recommend Chabon's book, especially for males and females who don't quite get males. In fact, pretty much anything of Chabon's is worth your time.

A Wonderful Rejection Letter.

Few writers ever reach the point where they don't still receive the occasional rejection, and I'm certainly nowhere near that level. But when an editor takes the god time and effort to provide not only a detailed by positive rejection based not on the story so much as its incompatability with a particular themed short story collection, it's worth sharing:

Dear Christopher,



I thank you for your consideration of "After Death…," however I have decided not to select your submission.




I appreciate the amount of time and work that you must have invested in this story, but I feel it does not quite fit the overall character of the book I'm compiling.


Christopher, technically you've written a nice story and I enjoyed reading it. It's thoughtful, interesting, and you really cover a lot of ground in your writing.


However, your story doesn't fit the theme of this anthology. I am looking for stories exploring what occurs to us after we die. Your character, Franklin, is alive and searches for meaning in the death of his daughter. His exploits are all in the realm of "the living," though he seems to transition or attempt to access other realms through use of meditation, drugs, etc. Though I understand where you're going with this, it seems to skirt the question I ask in this anthology... what happens to the soul/ spirit/ essence AFTER the human body dies.


Consider a first-hand perspective from a dead character's point of view.


What happens to your character after they die? Where do they go? What do they see? Heaven or Hell? Another universe? Reincarnation? Other spirits? Wild adventures? Etc. For example, if the Demon had killed Franklin at the beginning of the story - what would have then happened to him?


Also, just a quick thought - be conscientious of your usage of "all caps" or bold font or extra tabs (ex. "And something strange happened.") - generally emphasis should made be via italics, though more importantly by the strength of your prose, rather than the choice of formatting.






Keep writing! I am certain you will be able to find a publisher for this elsewhere.






I also read, "Always Say Treat," in the Feast of Frights - great story. I look forward to reading more material from you in the future.




Warm regards,








Eric J. Guignard

A Question for the Sages.

Believe it or go to hell, but I am not the snobbiest snob that ever snobbed when it comes to grammar, except where writers are concerned. Or, more accurately, people who refer to themselves as writers. When someone does that, it's impossible to take them seriously when they send me a note, even one that's positive, containing an error so egregious, my innards rupture and fill my digestive tract with many fluids.

Case in point: I received the following well-meaning note from someone on a certain social networking who self-identifies as an Independent Writer and Management Consultant:

"Christopher,

I just seen your updates congrats, keep up the hard work."

I repeat: Independent Writer and Management Consultant!!!

Sigh~

Am I being an elitist here?

Funeral for a Matriarch.

Tomorrow, after one-hundred years on this planet, my grandmother will be "laid to rest" following a funeral service at the very church she helped to establish more than three decades ago. I've chosen not to write anything. I did that for my mother's funeral and very nearly lost it. If I do speak, I will do it from the heart and stop when I feel I've said enough.

Author Q&A

Feel free to join the discussion by clicking here regarding the Zippered Flesh anthology, feauturing the authors of our individual short stories. Ask us anything...except that! Never that!

A Feast of Frights, My Official Press Release.

Michigan writer contributes to international horror anthology






Southfield, MI – April 10, 2012 – Southfield writer and Greak Lakes Association of Horror Writers member Christopher Nadeau's “Always Say Teat” will appears in the horror anthology, A Feast of Frights from the Horror Zine, available in print and digital formats from The Horror Zine Books. A Feast of Frights, edited by Jeani Rector, features a roster of acclaimed writers, comprising a who’s-who of the genre for the past half century.





The mission of The Horror Zine is to support and promote emerging writers, poets, and artists by featuring their work alongside masters of the macabre A Feast of Frights from The Horror Zine will also include short fiction from Simon Clark (The Night of the Triffids), Graham Masterton (Showtime’s The Hunger), Joe R. Lansdale (Showtime’s Masters of Horror), Susie Moloney (A Dry Spell), Tom Piccirilli (The Coldest Mile), and Ed Gorman (Gun Truth) with a forward from Ramsey Campbell (Grin of the Dark) and essays from Earl Hamner, Jr. (The Twilight Zone) and many others.





Two-time Bram Stoker Award-winner Bentley Little says of The Horror Zine: “I have seen the future of horror—and so has Jeani Rector. In fact, she’s publishing it. The Horror Zine books are not only fantastic reads, but they provide a valuable public service, exposing the world to up-and-coming talent in fiction, poetry, and art. Amazing stuff.”



Apex Magazine Submissions Editor DeAnna Knippling says the following of “Clawed Sod” by Christian A. Larsen: “I really liked the setup and the humor in what [he] had the main character try to solve his problem,” and “the story's funny and matter-of-fact disturbing.”





A Feast of Frights (The Horror Zine Books) edited by Jeani Rector

478 pages, $16.99 (trade paperback), $4.99 (Kindle)





About the Author





Christopher Nadeau is the author of 'Dreamers at Infinity's Core' through COM Publishing as well as over two dozen published short stories in such august publications as The Horror Zine, Sci-Fi Short Story Magazine, Ghostlight Magazine and more anthologies than one could take out with the toss of a single hand grenade. He was interviewed as part of Suspense Radio’s up and coming authors program and collaborated on two “machinima” films with UK animator Celestial Elf called “The Gift,” and 'The Deerhunter's Tale,” both of which can be viewed on YouTube. His novel “Echoes of Infinity's Core” is slated for a 2012 release.



An active member of the Great Lakes Association of Horror Writers, Chris Resides in Southeastern Michigan with his wife Lorie and two petulant long-hair Chihuahuas.



For more information, please visit thehorrorzine.com or contact Christopher Nadeau at christophernadeau71@yahoo.com or http://christopher-nadeau.blogspot.com/.

The Wait Is Over.

As I wrote a while ago, the Static Movement "Shadows Within Shadows 2" anthology is one I've been looking forward to since my "un-gettable" short story was accepted for publication in its pages. The story, "Hawk Vs. Dove at a Coffee Shop," is the tale of divisive politics taken to a murderous extreme and told from the perspectives of two represenatives of both sides of the so-called "aisle" with escalating tensions and eventual tragedy.

It also features a story by me called "Bringing Down the Curtain," which is about one man's chance to end all warfare...but it the final result worth the means to reach it?

Amazon Author Page Now Up.

It's frustrating, though, because since the editors of the various anthologies featuring my work didn't list me as one of their contributing authors, I have to send individual emails to Amazon to try and get myself authorized to link them. So, the few books you'll currently see there are the only ones I can post at this time.

Click here for the page.

*Note*
Amazon claims it can take up to three days to get this issue resolved, but they'd already resolved the first one by the time I posted this.